“If I’m Left, Then I Have to Be the Best Little Gay Boy Ever”
In the early 1980s, Stan, 59, was working for a scientific journal in which the first papers about the then-mysterious illness (i.e., AIDS) were being published. He was at the center of the initial scientific research on HIV and AIDS. His account marks the beginning of perhaps the major transition in the lives of this cohort of gay men. Stan is HIV negative, but lost many of his friends, and a boyfriend, to AIDS. Although his life could be portrayed as “successful aging”—a thriving professional career, comfortable middle-class status, and an engagement in routine physical activity—he feels the lack of personal connections and longs for an emotional and sexual companionship.
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