The nurturing approach to love
‘We walk in the dream, but dream no more’
This chapter presents the alternative ‘Nurturing Approach’ approach to love, which emphasizes self-worth, autonomy, and development with the hope that such an approach would have a greater chance of survival at this day and age. This is based on the assumption that for romantic love to be nurtured, the lover is supposed to be profoundly satisfied with the way in which the relationship enhances her own development and satisfaction. ‘Nurturing Approach’ to love is distinct due to the following principles: self-validated versus other-validated model because it promotes autonomy and self-worth; intrinsically versus extrinsically valuable activities because it is focused upon the activity itself, not its results; promoting versus preventing behavior because it nurtures the relationship; uniqueness versus exclusivity because it celebrate an ideal; and functional harmony versus mechanical fusion because the closeness between lovers arises from the experience of growing and developing together.
Keywords: Nurturing Approach, self-worth, autonomy, development, satisfaction, self-validated model, intrinsically valuable activities, promoting behavior, uniqueness, functional harmony
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