Structural difficulties in romantic love
‘Hard times for lovers’
To understand the psychological difficulties in romantic ideology, this chapter presents a short description of some characteristics of emotions and love. Since emotions are generated when we perceive a significant change in our situation, emotional intensity decreases as familiarity increases. The chapter examines the role of change and exclusivity in emotional behavior. These features indicate structural difficulties in maintaining long-term passionate romantic love. The chapter describes some changes in modern society, which make these structural emotional difficulties even harder to cope with, and facilitate the collapse of long-established romantic frameworks and practices. Staying within a committed relationship has become a choice that requires constant reexamining of the presence of love which includes compromise. The chapter notes that to compromise is to accept certain behavior that is still viewed as negative, whereas to accommodate is to change ones attitude so that this behavior no longer be considered negative.
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